Sketch Me
by Pam The Clam
Summary: Seamus is jealous? Yes, he thinks so. Deamus  dean/seamus , slash, don't like don't read! thanks!
1. I

**A/N: **Since my last fic isn't really good, I shall make a good one! Enjoy~

It was a usual evening at Hogsmeade, the students are spending their weekend mostly at Hogsmeade. The Three Broomsticks was crowded with students, including Seamus and his best friend, Dean. They sat at a table for two, sipping a glass of butterbeer. Dean was browsing through his sketchbook, looking for mistakes he could've made earlier while Seamus was looking at the people there. Seamus saw Draco and his gang sitting in a corner, whispering.

"Hey, Dean.." Seamus said as he nudged his friend. Dean looked up, "Yea?" he said as Seamus pointed to Draco and his gang. "What do you think they're talking about? It's seemed so secret-ish.." Seamus said, as Draco and his gang were browsing through some papers. Dean sighed, "Seamus, you always have to know every secret there is at Hogwarts, do you?" Dean said as he turned back his concentration on his sketches. Seamus looked at Dean, "what is they're plotting something bad? I ought to know!" Seamus looked back again at the Slytherins while Dean sighed and took a sip of his butterbeer.

Seamus saw that some of the papers Draco was holding fell, he nudged Dean again, "Dean, look!" Seamus' eyes were on the fallen papers, but Dean had put his gaze on something else. Draco bent down to get his papers, Dean blinked, "Seamus, you know what?" he said as he straighten up and opened a blank page on his sketchbook. Seamus still kept his eyes on the papers, "what?" he asked. "Draco had a nice body, I would love to draw that!" he said as he know sketching at his sketchbook, Seamus glared at the taller boy, "What?" he said. Dean, still sketching on his sketchbook answered, "He had a nice arse, I would love to draw that. Maybe I should make an arrange—" Seamus cut Dean's words with a death glare, "Are you kidding? Those papers had every Howarts' students' name on it! What if he might do something bad?" Seamus said, his tone became more and more serious.

"You know what his father's like," he started again as Dean put his gaze on Draco again, "Dean, he's from Slytherin! Why are you wanting to sketch him, sketch someone else!" Seamus doesn't know why but he had this unhappy feeling inside him. Dean looked at him again, "since when you cared about what or who I sketched?" Dean asked. Seamus paused, he doesn't even know. "I.. er.. Dean—I.. " Seamus was acting odd, trying to find a reason why Dean should sketch someone else besides Draco. Dean raised an eyebrow, "If you don't—" "Fine, you can sketch whoever you want! I'm going out!" Seamus left his money at the table and leaved harshly. Dean was dumbfounded.

Seamus was near the lake, alone. He was gazing at the reflections at the lake, why couldn't Dean just sketch this? He thought. Then, someone's hand landed on his shoulders, it was someone with a darker complexion than him, with long fingers, they were Dean's. "Hey." He sat beside Seamus, who was frowning now. "What do you want?" Seamus snapped as he moved Dean's hand from his shoulders. Dean let out a silent laugh, "that's what I wanted to ask you, what do _you_ want?" Seamus, still frowning gazed at the lake, "nothing" he murmured. Dean being a good friend he is smiled, "there must be something Seamus, just tell me okay? I won't get angry.." he said as calm as possible although inside, he was panicking on why Seamus became snappish and all.

Seamus looked at Dean and back again at the lake, "what do you see in him, that made you want to sketch him?" he bent and lay on his back, looking at the blue sky above. "Well," Dean started as he too lay on his back beside Seamus. "he has a nice body," Seamus scowled, Dean laughed a bit. "What kind of body does he have?" Seamus asked again, putting both arms behind his head. "It's thin, and I've got to admit I like people with thin bodies." Dean said, "but people without them isn't bad either.." Dean added unconsciously as he lay his gaze on Seamus face. Seamus felt a pair of dark eyes gazing on him, "really.." he said as he turned his head, their eyes met. Dean thought Seamus' eyes are beautiful. Before he could compliment anything Seamus already spoke, "So are you still going to plan to sketch him?" Dean shut his eyes, thinking, "well, if he wants to I would." So Seamus isn't angry – or somehow unhappy—again to Dean. They went to the Great Hall together that night for dinner.

Seamus was hungry, he managed to gather a complete meal on his plate, he started to eat as Dean locked his gaze at Draco again. Seamus tried to swallow his food so he could talk properly, "Dean," he said as he swallowed his mashed potatoes, "you're staring again. Do you have a crush on him?" the unhappy feeling was stabbing him again, right at his heart. He hated that feeling, whatever it was he hated it. Dean smiled as he took a spoonful of his mashed potatoes. "Well, I asked him this evening, when you were at the dorm, that if he wanted to be my model, he said he would as long as I didn't spread the news. I didn't know he was rather kind.." Dean started chewing his food, Seamus' unhappy feeling somewhat grew larger, "Oh.. that's nice.." he said it half-heartedly as if he don't like seeing someone he hates with someone he… loves—in a friendly way—together.

Seamus was halfway through eating his chicken until he paused, he remembered Dean's words clearly in his mind, he know what he was feeling. The feeling was the same feeling he had when his parents went to a trip to somewhere he always wanted to go, the feeling of jealousy. He didn't know why he was jealous of Dean sketching Draco but he know how to prevent that feeling to haunt him again. He remembered what Dean said about how he liked thin guys (or girls, whatever). Seamus thought that if he was thin Dean could put his attention to him. Something else was haunting his mind now. Why was he jealous and wanting Dean's attention? What if.. what if he loves Dean? In an 'I-love-you-please-be-mine' way? As if he had an unknown crush on Dean? He swallowed his chicken and stared at Dean who was staring at Draco who was staring at his friends. He looked at Dean's lips, beautiful lips, Seamus thought.

Seamus was now confused, either loving his best friend is a good thing, or a bad thing? He nudged Dean as he stared into somewhere not Dean. "What is it, mate?" Dean asked, his voice is gentle, the word 'mate' sounded more like 'shay' in his ears, Seamus melted. "Seamus?" Dean asked again as Seamus went pink. "Oh, sorry." He said, going back to reality. "Uhh.. " he forgot what he was going to say, then he remembered, "Do you think being gay is a good thing?" he asked, putting the peas away to the end of his plate playfully. Dean's eyebrows furrowed, "why did you ask?" Seamus, still putting the peas away answered, "incase you got a crush on him.." he muttered, not wanting to be heard by anyone else. Dean let out a small laugh, "No, no, I don't like him.." he said as he took a sip from his Pumpkin juice. "Besides, I liked somebody else already.." Seamus felt as if there was hope for him.

Seamus pushed his unfinished plate. Dean saw him and grabbed Seamus' wrist, Seamus thought he could've melt. "You're done?" Dean asked curiously. Seamus wanted a diet so he would be thin, that's for sure. "Yeah, I.. I'm not hungry.." Seamus took his drink and drank it empty. "But—but you looked so happy when dinner time came. You always finish your food!" Dean said as he lay his eyes on Seamus'. "I…" Seamus was lost for words, Dean's gaze was pinning him down to the ground. "I'll pass for today.." he stood up and went to the dorms, he had left Dean dumfounded for the second time.

**A/N: **Chapter 2 will be uploaded! ^-^ R&R if you like~


	2. II

**A/N: **Hm, sorry for taking chapter 2 so long, I have less time to write yesterday, eep! OK then, do enjoy~

The next morning, Seamus woke up with an empty stomach. He got up and thought that if he ate something with less fat for breakfast today he could be thinner than usual. Dean said he likes thin guys, why not he be thin? Just like what Dean likes to sketch? He wants to be sketched by Dean, he wanted to get more attention from Dean, he wants… Dean..

Seamus hurriedly got up, got prepared as everyone were still snoring on their beds, and went to the Great Hall early, he jogged all the way there. The Great Hall wasn't as packed as usual, it was too early to be noisy. Seamus saw a few Gryffindor students already on their way chomping breakfast, a couple of Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws, and… Draco.. with his gang at the Slytherin table. Seamus saw Draco, he was eating like all the other students do, how does he keep his body so thin? Seamus thought as he sat down. He looked at the menu served, Seamus thought for a while then proceeded to take his breakfast. He ate less then any other breakfast he had ever ate, he felt weird but at least his diet is going well so far..

It was getting more late and more people came to the Great Hall, Seamus already finished his breakfast and was drinking his drink as Dean came and sat beside him. "You didn't wait for me," he said a bit gloomily. "But you never—" Seamus turned to him with an apologetic look, "I'm.. I'm sorry, It's just that…" Seamus couldn't tell Dean he's on a diet so he lied, "I'm… going to do my homework, that's why I got an early breakfast!" he finishes. Dean nodded, "fine, where are you going?" Dean hold Seamus' wrist as he stood up, "homework," Seamus said as he ran letting Dean's hands slip away from his. It felt terrible, but he had to do morning exercises. So he did. He walked around the castle and greeting everyone he knew, he even nodded to a Slytherin student he once shared a cauldron with at Potions class. But the guy just walked away with a look of disgust, Seamus ignored it though.

It was their first class, Dean and Seamus sat again together as usual. At this kind of times, which happen really often, Seamus felt happy. He liked being with Dean, having Dean sitting beside him, having Dean helping him with the stuff he doesn't understand.. Seamus smiled, "..Seamus?" Dean poked Seamus, "oh, sorry. I was just thinking about something happy…" Seamus said as professor McGonagall started the class. Seamus could hear Dean laugh, that little laugh he does every time Seamus did something stupid. Seamus liked it, he loved it. Seamus looked at his own hands, it's not as thin as Draco's. Seamus frowned a bit then decided he ought to eat less at lunch, he knows it's going to be a challenge but this is for his own good, wanting attention from Dean.

So class finished, and Seamus was hungry, again. He put his arms round his stomach, trying to stop the hungriness, and Dean noticed. "What's up?" he looked at Seamus with worried eyes. "I'. fine, thank you" he sat at the Great Hall and saw many of his favorite meals. He hurriedly grab the things but stopped, he thought that was enough for someone who was on a diet. It was not much and Dean had to ask again, "Seamus are you feeling well?" Dean asked, he put the back of his hands at Seamus' forehead. Seamus went pink, Dean is touching his forehead, "I—I'm fine.." he tried to hide his pink face from Dean. "Seamus, I think you should see madam Pomfrey.." Dean said, looking more worried than before. "N.. no. Let me eat first.." Seamus took his food but Dean starts to talk again. "Seamus, you usually eat more than that. Are you sure you're okay?" he hold Seamus' hands, Seamus' heart had skipped a beat. "I'm okay.." Seamus avoided Dean's eyes and started munching down his food. Dean looked at Seamus once, than started to eat too.

It was divinations class after lunch, Seamus doesn't feel so good, but he refuse to talk to anyone. He sat down as Dean sat down and looked at the book in front of them. They're suppose to do something with dreams, Seamus was a bit sleepy, or tired, or just hungry. Dean asked Seamus, "OK, what was your last dream about?" Seamus paused to think, he was dreaming something about Dean.. "it was about.." Seamus started, trying to make his dream not to obvious for Dean to know he's in love with him, "Umm. It was about me and someone I love.." He said as Dean read something on the page of the books. Dean looked at Seamus, "who… is this someone?" Dean said as he raised an eyebrow. Seamus shrugged, "well.. it's a secret!" Seamus stuck his tongue out which made Dean laughed the little laugh Seamus loved.

So they went through the lesson as usual, although Seamus felt less energetic than the days before. Dean noticed it a bit, but he only thought Seamus was tired from the homework so he won't budge. "What was your dream two weeks ago, Dean?" it was Seamus' turn to ask, Dean thought for a moment. "I was dreaming about…" he thought again, trying to remember. Seamus' eyelids felt like they might shut tight for the next second, but he tried not to. Dean muttered something, Seamus couldn't quite catch it, he felt dizzy and on the next second he felt his back on the floor and a scream, Seamus collapsed.

Dean was rushing after class finally ended, he rushed to the hospital wing when he met Madam Pomfrey on the way, "Madam Pomfrey!" he exclaimed, looking rather tired. "Oh, Dean—" Madam Pomfrey was cut, Dean started to spoke again as if Madam Pomfrey wasn't speaking at all, "How's Seamus? Is he alright? What happened to him?" he was really eager to see Seamus. "Calm down, he hasn't eat lot hasn't he? I just gave him some food, he won't eat. Could you help him? You're his friend.." Madam Pomfrey looked pleased as Dean nodded and burst his way in to the hospital wing. "Seamus!" he saw Seamus on a bed on the left. Seamus lifted his head up, "Dean?" he grinned a weak grin.

Dean looked at the table beside Seamus' bed, the food was untouched. Dean sighed heavily, "Seamus you have to eat—" "No, Dean. I can't!" Seamus said as he pushed the food tray a bit further. "You look hungry, mate.." Dean's voice became softer, he sat on the edge of Seamus' bed. Seamus shook his head and lay them to the pillow again, energy not enough. Dean sighed again, "what are you up to Seamus?" he lifted the tray and put it on Seamus lap. "nothing.." he murmured. Dean pulled a chair and sat down beside his bed. "Seamus, if there's anything I could help—" Seamus felt his tears going down his cheeks, "Seamus? What's wrong?" Dean asked as he stood up to wipe Seamus' tears away. Seamus stopped Dean's long, thin fingers wiping his tears away, "Dean, I.." Seamus had to admit it before it's too late.

"Dean, I.." Seamus repeated as Dean hold both Seamus' hands, they're a bit cold. Dean hoped his hands would warm Seamus' hands. "I think.. I—" "Seamus," Dean cut him off. Seamus looked up at him, but said nothing "Seamus, please tell me why are you acting so weird? I'm.. I'm really worried.." he said sitting on the edge of Seamus' bed again. Seamus took a deep breath, "Dean, I got.. jealous.." he started, Dean kept his hands on Seamus'. "I'm jealous because," he took a deep breath. "You drew Malfoy.. instead of someone… you know, more good than him. And I—" Dean stared directly into Seamus' eyes, "I.. I wanted to be the thin guy you always adore…" Seamus tried not to let his tear escape, but he can't. Dean stood up again, "Seamus, I—I'm sorry.. I—I'll cancel my appointment with him! I'll draw you instead!" Dean said hoping Seamus will smile again, he doesn't want Seamus to get hurt…. Because of him.

"You don't have to Dean," Seamus stopped sobbing, wiping his tears away. "I'll be happy if you're happy.." Seamus forced a smile, Dean still looked worried, but then he smiled. The smile that made Seamus' heart skipped a beat, "Seamus," Dean started again as Seamus played with Dean's fingers. "At least you should start eating again.." Dean took the square pieces of chocolate Madam Pomfrey cut for Seamus. Dean put a piece between his mouth, and leaned to Seamus. Dean could see how beautiful Seamus' eyes are at such distance, Seamus had thought the same, Dean pushed his mouth to Seamus', making Seamus feel the chocolate pushed inside his mouth, Seamus bit it to half and Dean backed away a bit, "feeling better?" he said with a very soft and gentle voice, Seamus was too happy to answer, he cupped Dean's face and pulled it closer. Seamus took the other half, making both their lips touch, Seamus loved it.

Seamus swallowed the other half of the chocolate and it felt warm inside him, Dean made it warm. Dean smiled and kissed Seamus softly, Seamus kissed him back. "Dean, I love you.. I really do.." Seamus said, resting his forehead on Dean's, closing his eyes feeling the joy bubbling inside him. "I love you too Seamus," he kissed Seamus once again and sat back down onto his chair. "We forgot your food.." Dean said as he took the spoon and tried to make Seamus eat again. "Dean, I can do it myself—" Seamus tried to seize the spoon out of Dean's hand, but Dean was fast enough to snatch it, took some food and lifted it up to Seamus' mouth, "now eat, okay?" he smiled as Seamus finally being able to eat like usual again.

**A/N: **That felt like it took me forever~ :D


End file.
